Stop Overthinking It and Live Your Purpose Now!
/Have you struggled to define your purpose or wondered why you don’t seem to have identified this elusive destination or state? Have you stayed at your career longer than you want to because you aren’t sure what is next or what might be engaging and meaningful? Or, do you ruminate on it or see your purpose as something you might just not have - somehow you are not quite wired that way?
The search for purpose is all over social media these days and sometimes it is overwhelming as we see this mysterious “purpose” as something at the end of the rainbow that we just can’t quite reach.
I am here to tell you what I wish someone had told me a few years ago. There is nothing wrong with you. It’s time to stop overthinking this “purpose“ thing and just do those things you love doing and be the person you are because that is when you will understand what it means to live your purpose and truly be aligned with what gives you meaning. Whether you are starting a new chapter or considering retiring in a while and not being able to articulate your “purpose” is holding you back, I am hear to give you a few easy steps to stop overthinking and start living…and your meaningful, engaging, and purpose-filled life will be revealed as you live your life!
Some people as teenagers knew they were going to be heart surgeons, lawyers, or business owners. Others, maybe even me, might have been a little less clear about the road ahead. However, even knowing your occupation doesn’t necessarily reveal your purpose. If you chose one of those occupations above, your purpose could have been to cure a disease or to help people feel better, or bringing justice to the world or your particular product or service to make life easier for others, or something else, but deeper inside the activity, the purpose was there.
According to some, purpose is not a title or noun, but it is actually a verb. It isn’t some role you are filling but more the legacy you are leaving. It is what you stand for and what you do in the world - and I see it is an overarching theme like “leaving this world a better place, one human connection at a time” or whatever your particular theme might be. It is not something to be discovered, but perhaps something to be embodied. Btw, there are no right and wrongs, as this is personal to you.
Begin, by asking the questions “What gets me excited?” “What makes me jump out of bed and seize the day?” Following our interests always guides us well. Even if it isn’t some monetarily rewarding, there are other rewards to reap. If its going to the gym, meeting friends for coffee, taking a vigorous hike or pilates or yoga class. This might lead to something else or that person that connects you to something further, but just doing what you love can never steer you wrong. Living intentionally, connected to what’s important to you, and making a positive impact along the way can help you live on purpose.
Next, think about your why for being here on this planet, at this time. Why are you here? What impact do you want to leave? What kind of legacy is important for you. I am not talking so much the financial legacy, although that can be part of it, but more about the memories you will leave with loved ones once you are gone. Do you want to be the favorite aunt or the cranky old uncle? Again, there is no wrong answer here - but sometimes we haven’t considered our impact on the folks around us. Relationships bring meaning.
A purpose could be about creating beautiful music or art. It could be helping others, healing, or mentoring. There is really no arbiter of what it can be, but each person can embody something that is meaningful to them. For my mother, it was being the loving matriarch of a family - one that she poured her heart and soul into. I think for the longest time she felt that because her career was being a stay-at-home mom, she really didn’t have a purpose. However, in several conversations we had prior to her passing, she realized that being that person who nurtured and raised four children and then helped with the eleven grandchildren that followed, her purpose had been about creating family, connection, and legacy. That realization brought peace and meaning to her life.
As we move into our midlife chapters, we are able to reflect more about things as we may seem to have more time, or make more time for it. Meaning and connection are a component to purpose. What we do has to be meaningful to us and likely is meaningful because you are doing it for someone else or with someone else. Relationship is key and so thinking about nurturing your relationships and considering deeply who you are and who you want to be is pivotal to finding a purpose. Purpose can and to me is a bigger idea, and is also the notion of learning and growing and giving to others that provides the deeper meaning. Embodying purpose can be as simple as making each day a gift, for you and for others, and determining to make the most of it, no matter what comes along.
One recent book that I was referred to on purpose was “The Power of Purpose” written by Richard Leider and David Shapiro. This is a great resource for those wanting more in-depth activities and reflection. Leider has been studying purpose for many years so has lots to share.
In this chapter of your life, what does purpose mean to you? What drives you forward? How can you grow and learn and find satisfaction in the things you are engaged in? There is no right answer, but follow your interests and my guess is you will be on the right path.
If you would like to discuss your purpose and what brings you meaning, set up a Discovery call with me to start exploring. I look forward to the conversation!
